Our Fantasy Wine Shop In Batanes February 28, 2009
Posted by Alexander Sawit in Stuff in General.add a comment
By Alex Sawit
28 February 2009
I’ve come to a decision, Cyrano friends. I’m going to open a Cyrano wine shop in Batanes.
Yes, Batanes.
I hear you. I don’t have to be a mind reader to know what you’re thinking, something along the lines of, “WHAT THE &@%#… A WINE SHOP IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE??? HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND???”
Hear me out. It’s all about location, location, location. That is, a location like the one in this picture:
No, there is no business plan. No, I don’t expect customers to beat a path to our door – I don’t expect to have any customers, period. And no, there is no capital investment. It’s all wishful thinking, sort of. After all, if other folks can entertain starry eyed visions of building their dream homes, why can’t I dream about opening our wine shop in what is arguably the most magical place in the Philippines?
Sigh… but what a dream it is.
If you’ve never heard of Batanes, it’s the province that lies to the extreme north of the country, so far north that on a clear day it is said that one can see Taiwan from the province’s northernmost island. Separated from the mainland of Luzon by nearly two hundred kilometers, it remains one of the less accessible destinations in the Philippines due to both its distance from the capital and its vulnerable latitude, which lies in the regular path of some of the country’s most forbidding storms during the typhoon season. But while these factors have traditionally deterred visitors, they have also allowed Batanes to thrive in isolation as an unspoiled gem of natural and cultural beauty.
Having just returned from there more than a week ago, I will say unequivocally that Filipinos will not find anything more breathtaking anywhere else in their own homeland. Photographers and film directors love to describe Batanes as the closest thing one can find in the Philippines to a Mediterranean coastline, often drawing comparisons to Italy or Greece. Other travelers speak of Ireland or New Zealand, while I myself have seen Northern California’s jagged coast conjured in a few of the many stunning seascapes to be found in this province.
There is much I want to say about Batanes, that enchanted windswept world wherein time has a different meaning and where the people are the noble guardians of their own identity. But that’s for another discussion. For now, I offer Cyrano friends a glimpse of three fantasy locations where I can only dream of opening a shop where we can all hang out to share good wine before a glorious view. By all means, feel free to tell me which one you like best.
Wine Shop Location No. 1: “Rakuh a Payaman” on Batan Island
Popularly known outside Batanes as “Marlborough Country,” this communal pasture overlooks a spectacular panorama of the surrounding coast. Laden with spellbinding visual textures, the view starts on the left with Mahatao Lighthouse moving toward Mt. Iraya and the big Pacific Ocean on the right.
Wine Shop Location No. 2: “Vayang Ranch” on Batan Island
Also referred to in tourist guide books as “The Rolling Hills.” Surrounded by stark, weathered fence posts running along the slopes, the lonely hilltop at the heart of the ranch offers visitors a hauntingly beautiful view of the South China Sea. Wine lovers will definitely want to watch those gorgeous sunsets over the horizon with a glass of vino in hand.
Wine Shop Location No. 3: “Saddleback Rock” on Sabtang Island
Overlooking Chamantad Marine Sanctuary is a coastal point leading to the Ivatan village of Chavayan. In the absence of a name, I refer to it as “Saddleback Rock.” Towering above the pounding waves and cutting through the wind from the sea, it forms the right side of a beguiling cove in which turquoise waters transform to aquamarine in the shallows. The clifftop from where these pictures of Saddleback Rock were taken would be an incredible location for our fantasy wine shop.
Food & Sex February 23, 2009
Posted by Alexander Sawit in Food & Drink, The Opinion Page.add a comment
By Alex Sawit
23 February 2009
WARNING: THE FOLLOWING CONTAINS MATERIAL THAT MAY BE MISCONSTRUED AS OBSCENE BY THE INTELLECTUALLY CHALLENGED. CYRANO FRIENDS MAY DISREGARD THIS AND PROCEED, OTHERWISE PARENTAL DISCRETION IS ADVISED.
“Food Porn.”
I don’t know about you, but to my way of thinking it takes an admirably fiendish mind to coin a phrase like that. Admirable because of the simplicity with which such an innocent everyday word could be comfortably juxtaposed with another so vulgar and indecent; fiendish because, well, it just is.
Whether celebrity chef Anthony Bourdain invented the phrase or just popularized it, and regardless of whether I approve of it or not, I tip my hat to him. Even though he’s been gleefully using the phrase on his show for years, hearing it still brings amusement to my pseudo-scandalized ears and I’m sure Bourdain gets a kick out of just saying it. No wonder he was gabbing at his poetic best, albeit luridly, his voice-over seemingly more emphatic than usual as he narrated his pre-Valentine’s Day presentation of No Reservations, the aptly titled “Food Porn” Special Episode.
What is food porn exactly, as defined by Bourdain? To put it this way, it is food so good that the sight of it makes a culinary nerd like Tony feel like he’s feasting his eyes on a mind-blowing pictorial of the Playmate of the Month. Just like a centerfold treat of lusciously sweet curves, creamy smooth legs and ripe bosom ampleness, food this seductive gives Tony the “gastronomic equivalent of morning wood,” as he calls it.
So think of No Reservations: Food Porn as an unapologetic acknowledgment. With guest scenes of chefs tempting us with sinful creations and explicit camera close ups of wickedly decadent dishes, Bourdain gets in your face to remind you of something that I suspect we all already know deep down inside. That is, like fine porno, good food is orgasmic.
Care to disagree?
That’s what came up for discussion the other week after I and a few guests viewed segments of the episode at the wine shop. This still being a country with a heavy Roman Catholic predisposition, the idea that food and sex share an intrinsic connection seemed to unsettle my audience ever so imperceptibly.
“I always like to tell folks,” I tried explaining in so many words I can’t remember, “that food and sex – or food and love if you prefer, since this is Valentine’s Week – are two sides of the same coin.”
“You only have to examine the language,” I proceeded to say. “Romance writers have been telling us this for centuries, but we rarely stop to think about the connection even though the clues stare us in the face whenever we read the words. Whenever we talk or read about sex, why is it that we enjoy describing it with words we associate with food? Just listen to classic lines repeated in romantic literature.”
Lines like: She thirsted for his sweet kisses…. Feeding his gaze upon her beauty, he consumed the sight of her delicious feminine form…. Their appetites having been aroused and hungry for more, they devoured each other in a night of ravenous passion….
Or try the phrases of modern pop culture: Eye candy… sugar babe… beef cake… honey pot… cherry pie… sexy peach… hot tamale… popsicle toes…
And the porn industry? Why do you think they call it a “cheesecake” shot to begin with? Let’s not even explain the misuse of the word “pork” outside of government spending.
“The truth is,” I continued, “our primal instinct tells us that food and sex are practically one and the same thing. Eating sustains life, while sex is the action for creating life. In a sense, both have the same ultimate objective. The fact that both acts give us great pleasure helps ensure that we will be irresistibly motivated to achieve that objective. That’s why our ‘civilized’ minds can’t help but enjoy blurring the distinction between the two, because combining the two pleasures doubles our lust for life, if you will forgive me for saying it that way.”
Unfortunately, our shop talk was cut short by the priorities of running a business (like selling more wine to newly arriving guests). But I think I made my point clear to everyone. Know thyself, I always say.
Just to be fair, I’ll let Bourdain have the last word with his key message from the special episode that sparked this discussion in the first place:
“Food and wine leading to sex? Yes, as it should!!!”
